NO SUCH THING AS “NO FEAR”
In the Bear Creek area of the Houston suburbs there used to be a shop called the Seven Seas that, for me, existed for the sole purpose of selling No Fear t-shirts which I wore on the daily from ages 10-13.
No Fear was a clothing brand that was formed in the late 1980s that espoused the virtues of extreme sports. I’ve never really been sporty, much less “extreme” sporty but the slogan “No Fear” intrigued me. It was meant to signal something to others: I’m tough, don’t mess with me.
With certainty I know that that shirt and concept, were a thin veneer of courage over a teeming mess of fear and anxiety that could not be calmed or banished by costume. I doubt I’m alone on that.
Fear is the enemy of everything good. Fear is the enemy of compassion, love, progress, and more. The battle of life is less you versus your enemy, but you versus your fear. And you’ll have to overcome it to have a chance a joy or peace.
Fear is hard-wired into your brain, primarily through your amygdala and that poses a problem. How to overcome yourself by using…yourself?
The closest thing I’ve ever seen to a solution is in a presentation called Monkeys in the City by a guy named Jamie Winship. Be warned: it’s an hour and half, but well worth the time spent.
Without use of your higher functions, you will live as a hostage to your fears. And that, frankly, will make it hard to live at all.
I’ve never seen a client come to our firm and say I’m afraid to set goals, or I’m afraid to craft a vision for my future. It’s fun to dream about those things. Its, perhaps, a reprieve from the stress of now.
Fear is not an obvious player in goal setting of this nature, but it’s steering the ship while you’re voyaging toward those goals. Perhaps the market tanks or maybe you lose your job, in these circumstances, it’s natural to be afraid.
It’s not reasonable to ask people to be emotionless in trying times, and so we don’t ask people to try. Rather, we encourage them to reach out for help, especially before taking any hasty action. And that’s why we’re here.
We’re fond of saying that no plan survives its collision with reality. That’s true, but it’s not the end. Your plan adapts, just like your brain does with enough practice at controlling your fearful instincts.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve replaced my “No Fear” mentality with the “Scared to Death and Doing it Anyway” mentality, which looks a lot like confidence when honestly lived. Though I doubt we’ll be making any t-shirts about it.